Nursing Your Kids

A few months ago, before he got sick for the first time this winter, Sam was going to sleep. We’d read a few stories, kiss him good night and leave the room. It took about a week of putting him back to bed each time he’d get and standing in the hall until he was asleep, but it worked. 6 out of 7 nights he’d go to sleep on his own. Some nights he requested more kisses. Other nights he’d ask me to lay down with him and I would for a minute or two. Then I’d get up, kiss him again and leave the room.

But then he got sick and started getting the last of his 2 year molars at the same time. He was up coughing, couldn’t breathe through the congestion and his teeth hurt. A few nights in a row he slept with us and then we moved him back to his own bed when he was feeling better. Only he wouldn’t go to sleep anymore and he wouldn’t stay asleep We’d try to leave and he’d start to cry out for us to stay. His requests for more kisses turned into angry demands. He’d tell us where to put our heads on the pillow and which side of his bed to lie down on. When he woke in the night he’d demand either mama or dada and the other parent just wouldn’t do. His screams of anger and outrage would keep us both up if the wrong person came in to put him back to bed. He became a nasty little dictator.

We went back to trying to sleep train. I say we but I mean Bob. I just don’t have it in me, especially since I’m pregnant. We started a week ago and what worked the last time, putting him back in bed each time he got out no longer works. He gave himself a black eye banging his head on his many exhausted trips in and out of bed. Bob started sitting in the room with him until he fell asleep. That process takes hours. Each time Bob got up to leave Sam would wake up, furious.

At his two year well visit we asked our pediatrician what she thought. She says he’s manipulating us and we need to start putting him to bed and letting him scream, leaving completely and coming back every 10 minutes to put him back in bed. She suggested putting a sleeping bag on the floor so he won’t bump his head getting in and out of bed.

My inclination is to just give in and go to sleep with him to avoid the hours of screaming. But Bob agrees with the pediatrician. So sleep training it is. Last night, after two hours of screaming at the gate he fell asleep on the sleeping bag on the floor. He was still sniffling and crying a little in his sleep. It kills me. We’re just going to have to do this again when the baby comes and he stops sleeping all over again. It’s been just over an hour and he’s quiet. I wonder if he’ll stay that way.